M: Hi there, Boo Boo. We're back. Nice collar. Did you enjoy your weekend? And get off of Steve's chair. What did you do this weekend? (sounding bright, but slightly strained and disguising any worry)
B: Oh. You've returned, have you.
M: Um, we missed you Boo Boo (trying to sound believable). So um, what did you do this weekend? (trying not to make "do" sound suspicious)
B: Well, I can tell you that I did lots of this.
M: Um...anything else? (eyes glance around furtively)
B: And this.
B: And this.
M: Well, Boo Boo, I can believe that all you did was lay around and lick yourself, but I can't help but think that that looks vaguely like you are just making rude hand gestures.
B: Oh? Is that what you think? And I want to show you this.
M: What? I can't see what you're showing me.
B: Well, look again. You can tell the people who look at me on the thingy to look to their left and oh, about three inches down to see what I'm showing you...
M: You are just gross. Nobody wants to see that. I think I have a wine cork I saved from the weekend that you can stuff in it, Boo Boo. It's just great to be back (sarcastically).
(Goes off to look at what damage Boo Boo might have caused - finds nothing.)
(Steve wakes up the next morning and finds fresh cat pee on the couch.)
M: (squirting Oxi-clean on the spot) Boo Boo! You are such a jerk. There isn't enough jerk in the word jerk to say what a jerk you are.
Boo Boo: I forgot to tell you - your cork joke was really funny. There isn't enough funny in the word funny to describe how funny your cork joke was.
